Valentine’s Day/Ash Wednesday

 
Valentines Day & Ash Wednesday (Feb 14), an interesting combo of holydays this year. Valentines Day of course we think of love and romance, a time to express emotions, hand out little cards, boxes of chocolates, and for some reason a fat baby with wings and a bow and arrow. Love in scripture goes deeper than some of the superficiality we get on the commercialized day of Valentine, for it proclaims, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13) Ash Wednesday is the beginning of Lent, a time of self denial, fasting, prayer, and the giving of oneself to contemplate God’s ultimate act of love that culminates on Good Friday. It’s a time to think of our own mortality. During the imposition of ashes whereby a person makes the sign of the cross on the recipients forehead you may hear the words, “All are from dust, and to dust all return.” It’s a sobering thought. And working in a hospital I really think about this quite a bit, death. 

I think we as Americans suck at dealing with death. There is this underlying fear of it and sometimes surprise that it occurs at all. I hear families cry out, “Why did this have to happen…Why God did you take so and so?” And then there’s the great lengths people go to look younger, because showing age means you’re that much closer to death apparently. In the hospital families turn to aggressive end-of-life procedures like CPR, intubation, dialysis, and others even though the majority of doctors, 88.3%, would forgo such invasive measures. Families look to doctors as if to say, “Why can’t you do anything?” As if they’re God. Death is a part of life. Yes, sometimes it happens too soon for our liking. I can’t imagine losing a parent, sibling, or loved one even when they live to a ripe old age. I have never experienced a death of a person that’s been really close to me and I’m not looking forward to it. And then there’s the deaths of our young men adn women becaseBut I do know that it’s going to happen and the best thing we can do for our spiritual and emotional health is prepare ourselves and our loved ones because again, it’s going to happen. 

There is a Sufi saying, “Die before you die.” It sounds eerie and macabre, but what it’s saying in essence is die to your self, renew who you are and get rid of that which holds you back. We spend too much time building this façade, this mask of who we want people to see us as and it’s exhausting. In scripture this theme of dying is repeated throughout, “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” Paul in Ephesians writes, “…put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self…” (John 12:25) And last, “…our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin.” (Romans 6:6-7) Yes, if I live for myself in a selfish, self-centered way death indeed is scary. I’m afraid I’ll lose what I’ve hoarded, what I’ve accumulated. My reputation, my pride dies with me. We need to strip the non essentials from our lives and live in the freedom that coming to grips with death allows. We must lean into the courage of being vulnerable, of dying to self. If I continually give of myself and receive joy in that giving I will have lived a beautiful and fulfilling life no matter my time of death. AND there’s this whole eternal life thing. It’s funny, we sing songs like, 

All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

But then we freak out and act in complete opposition to these words whenever death comes knocking. So which is it? Paul wrestled with this whole death thing pretty well. In Philippians he writes, “To live is Christ and to die is gain.” This is not to say we should seek death, not at all. We should live our lives to the fullest, focusing on loving on each other, but we should also believe what we so often preach, that this isn’t the end, Jesus made sure of that. He is the hope of this world, the reason why Paul told the Thessalonians, “Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.” Think about that. As you see people this Wednesday with ashes on their foreheads, think about your life, what are you giving yourself to, pouring yourself into. The answer to this question has eternal significance. So maybe a better song would be,

I wanna live like there's no tomorrow
Love like I'm on borrowed time
It's good to be alive

This Valentines Day, think about those you love and what it means to give selflessly, to sacrifice being right, being the center of attention, and to instead pour yourself into their lives. Know that each of our lives on this earth is limited. For we are given but little time in this world, “All go to one place. All are from the dust, and to dust all return.” (Ecclesiastes 3:20)